Pussy Grabs Back! The Trump Monologues

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OPENS with music: PUSSY PEOPLE (Been Disgusting So Long)

Adapted from lyrics by David Bowie (hoping to obtain actual permission)

See your face so orange 

Feels like it’s been a thousand days

Creepier than Ted Cruz

And you think your dick is so long

Feel our blood enraged

It’s just the fear of electing you
Don’t want to say your name
Wish you would say, “so long”

And you’ve been putting out fire with gasoline

See your hair so… Red?
Red like the flow from our… wherever
From the pussy you grab (no! Never!)

Fool the bigots and wash their minds

They don’t see you’re so wrong

Scarier still is Mike Pence

Knowing he could be prez in a heartbeat

Don’t say “sorry” to us
We just can’t believe what we’ve been through

Think your fingers are so long?
Well, they’re not so long

And you’ve been putting out the fire with gasoline
Putting out the fire
With gasoline

See the money so green

Your heart’s three sizes too small, like the Grinch

Taxes you never paid, so mean!

And you think we’d suck your angry inch?

See your tweets so petty
We can’t stand your thousands of lies
Just be quiet already 
We can’t believe what Melania’s been through
You’ve been lying so long

You’ve been disgusting so long

And you’ve been putting out the fire with gasoline
Putting out fire with gasoline

Disgusting so long

Predator so long

Well, it’s been so long

Lying so long

I’ve been putting out fire

Fingers not long

Well, it’s been so long

Running so long

Been putting out fire

Say so long

It’s been so long

Say so long

Been putting out fire

Say so long

Say so long, so long, so long

Say so long, so long, so long

Been putting out fire

Say so long, so long, so long

Been putting out fire

Say so long, so long, so long

Narrator:

I bet you’re worried. I was worried. That’s why I began this project.

I was worried about Donald Trump. I was worried what we think about Donald Trump. And I was even more worried that we don’t think about him.

I was worried about pussies. They need protection. And a parody song. A parody play. A community and cultural response from women with pussies and also those without.

There is so much darkness surrounding Donald Trump’s treatment of women. In the first place, it’s nearly impossible to avoid Donald Trump these days.

Women have gone days, weeks, months, and no matter how much they try, they cannot avoid him. I chatted online with a high-powered businesswoman and she told me she doesn’t have time to protect her pussy.

Avoiding him is a full day’s work, she says. “You’ve got to shut down all your social media, turn off the TV and radio, avert all glances at newspapers and magazines, and of course avoid the gold-plated building on Fifth Avenue between East 57th and East 56th Streets in Manhattan. Trump Tower. And you can’t look directly at it.”

Since she was too busy, she risks going unprotected.

But I was undeterred and decided even without her help, I needed to do this project. It was Time for the Pussy to Grab Back. It started with a casual suggestion on Facebook. And it turned into The Trump Monologues.

I enlisted the help of other women: young women, older women, married women, pregnant women, women who are moms, lesbians, queers, transgender women, single women, college professors, corporate professionals, actors, sex workers, African-American women, Asian-American women, Hispanic women, Latinas, Native-American women, Caucasian women, Jewish women, Christian women and atheist women.

Not one woman was reluctant to talk about Donald Trump. Women love to talk about Donald Trump. They do. They really do. Mainly because we’ve been talking about him for more than a year and now people are finally paying attention.

Let’s just start with the most horrific thing he’s said — that we know of — so far:

“Grab them by the pussy.”

Them, being us. Women.

 

  1. The Vulgar Video

A presentation requiring two voices, as presented by NBC and the Washington Post

 

DONALD TRUMP: “I moved on her. Actually, she was down on Palm Beach. I moved on her and I failed. I’ll admit it. I did try and fuck her. She was married.”

BILLY BUSH: “That’s huge news!”

TRUMP: “Nancy, no this was… and I moved on her. Very heavily. In fact, I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture. I said ‘I’ll show you where they have some nice furniture’. I took her… I moved on her like a bitch. I couldn’t get there and she was married. And all of a sudden I see her. She’s now got the big phoney tits and she’s totally changed her look.”

BUSH: “Sheesh, your girl’s hot as shit. In the purple.”

TRUMP: “Whoa! Yes! Whoa!”

BUSH: “Yes! The Donald has scored. Whoa, my man!”

BUSH: ” It better not be the publicist. No it’s her, it’s…”

TRUMP: “Yeah that’s her in the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful… I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything.”

BUSH: “Whatever you want.”

TRUMP: “Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.”

 

  1. (More than) 23 Things Donald Trump Said About Women

As reported by Cosmopolitan and the Telegraph

“You know, it really doesn’t matter what they write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass. But she’s got to be young and beautiful.”

To a female lawyer who asked for a medical break during a deposition, to pump breast milk for her 3-month-old daughter: “You’re disgusting.”

“Robert Pattinson should not take back Kristen Stewart. She cheated on him like a dog & will do it again — just watch. He can do much better!”

About Megan Kelly of Fox News: “ “You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever.” And “Fox viewers give low marks to bimbo Megan Kelly will consider other programs!”

Later, he asked her: “Did I say that? Excuse me.” Then followed with “you’ve been called a lot worse, wouldn’t you say?”

About Arianna Huffington: “Ariana is unattractive both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left for a man — he made a good decision.”

He repeated the attack three years later: How much money is the extremely unattractive (both inside and out) Arianna Huffington paying her poor ex-hubby for the use of his name?”

To New York Times columnist Gail Collins he sent a copy of one of her columns with her picture circled and a note that read: “The Face of a Dog.”

“Sarah Jessica Parker voted ‘unsexiest woman alive” — I agree.”

To Celebrity Apprentice contestant and former Playboy playmate Brande Roderick: “It must be a pretty picture. You dropping to your knees.”

“Bette Midler is an extremely unattractive woman, I refuse to say that because I always insist on being politically correct.”

And of course, then there’s Rosie O’Donnell:

“Rosie is crude, rude, obnoxious and dumb ­ — other than that I like her very much!” He followed up by saying she deserved those insults “and everyone would agree and she deserves it” because of how “vicious” she’s been to him.

“Rosie O’Donnell is disgusting, both inside and out. If you take a look at her, she’s a slob. How does she even get on television? If I were running The View, I’d fire Rosie. I’d look her right in that fat, ugly face of hers and say, ‘Rosie, you’re fired.’

“We’re all a little chubby but Rosie’s just worse than most of us. But it’s not the chubbiness – Rosie is a very unattractive person, both inside and out.”

“Rosie’s a person who’s very lucky to have her girlfriend. And she better be careful or I’ll send one of my friends over to pick up her girlfriend, why would she stay with Rosie if she had another choice?”

In 2013, he replied to a tweet asking him how much he’d want to make-out with O’Donnell: “One trillion, at least!”

About wives who expected their husbands to change baby diapers: “There’s a lot of women out there that demand that the husband act like the wife and you know there’s a lot of husbands that listen to that. So you know, they go for it.”

About Gold Star grieving mom, Ghazala Khan: “Look at his wife, she was standing there. She had nothing to say. She probably, maybe she wasn’t allowed to have anything to say. You tell me.”

“Frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don’t think she’d get 5 percent of the vote. The only thing she’s got going is the women’s card.”

What should Ivanka Trump do if she faced sexual harassment on the job? “I would like to think she would find another career or find another company if that was the case.”

On women seeking abortions: “There has to be some form of punishment.”

Trump called NBC campaign reporter Katy Tur “Little Katy” and a “Third-Rate reporter,” and tweeted that she “should be fired.”

When Breitbart reporter Michelle Fields filed a criminal report against a Trump aide alleging assault, Trump said she had “a larger pattern of exaggerating incidents,” called her “terrible” and told Fox News host Geraldo Rivera “Maybe I should file a report, she was grabbing me.”

Heidi Cruz was his target when Trump tweeted that “Lyin’ Ted Cruz just used a picture of Melania from a G.Q. shoot in his ad. Be careful, Lyin’ Ted, or I will spill the beans on your wife!” And he retweeted an unflattering photo of their wives side by side.

Trump called Sen. Elizabeth Warren a “fraud,” “goofy” and “Pocahontas:” “Pocahontas is not happy, she’s not happy. She’s the worst. You know, Pocahontas I’m doing such a disservice to Pocahontas, it’s so unfair to Pocahontas  but this Elizabeth Warren, I call her ‘goofy,’ Elizabeth Warren, she’s one of the worst senators in the entire United States Senate.”

When Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg called Trump a “faker,” he tweeted “Justice Ginsburg of the U.S. Supreme Court has embarrassed all by making very dumb political statements about me. Her mind is shot — resign!”

About Mika Brzezinski, he tweeted she “is off the wall, a neurotic and not very bright mess” and suggested she is dating co-host Joe Scarborough, calling her “his very insecure long-time girlfriend.” He also called them “Two clowns.”

Trump used “neurotic” to describe the DNC’s former chair, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, too: “The highly neurotic Debbie Wasserman Schultz is angry that, after stealing and cheating her way to a Crooked Hillary victory, she’s out!”

About Kim Kardashian, Trump said “she’s gotten a little large” during her last pregnancy and “I don’t think you should dress like you’re 125 pounds,” then blessed her clothing choices when prodded by an interviewer: “Well, I think that’s great. If she feels good about herself, A.J., do it Kim.”

  1. Trump Through the Decades

from The Telegraph            

1990: “I would never buy Ivana any decent jewels or pictures. Why give her negotiable assets?”

1997: “There are basically three types of women and reactions. One is the good woman who very much loves her future husband, solely for himself, but refuses to sign the agreement on principle. I fully understand this, but the man should take a pass anyway and find someone else. The other is the calculating woman who refuses to sign the prenuptial agreement because she is expecting to take advantage of the poor, unsuspecting sucker she’s got in her grasp. There is also the woman who will openly and quickly sign a prenuptial agreement in order to make a quick hit and take the money given to her.”

2004: “All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.”

2005: According to one woman who appeared on the show, Trump told her: “I bet you make a great wife.” That soundbite never aired. Hmm, I wonder why?

2006: “If Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”

2007: “Beauty and elegance, whether in a woman, a building, or a work of art, is not just superficial or something pretty to see.”

About Angelina Jolie: “I really understand beauty. And I will tell you, she’s not – I do own Miss Universe. I do own Miss USA. I mean I own a lot of different things. I do understand beauty, and she’s not.”

Trump pitched a new reality show that was never produced, called “Lady or a Tramp” in which ‘”out of control” party girls would be sent to charm school to learn some manners. Because as the Telegraph reported, “God forbid a woman should be anything but demure.”

2008: Trump speaking of Anne Hathaway: “So when he had plenty of money, she liked him. But then after that, not as good, right?”

In 2009, Beauty queen Carrie Prejean revealed the ‘Trump rule’ at the Miss USA pageant, which required the women to parade in front of him so he could separate those he found attractive from those he didn’t: “Many of the girls found this exercise humiliating. Some of the girls were sobbing backstage after [he] left, devastated to have failed even before the competition really began,” she wrote in her book. “It was as though we had been stripped bare.”

2010: Contestant Mahsa Saeidi-Azcuy claimed that during taping of The Apprentice: “So much of the boardroom discussion concerned the appearance of the female contestant – discussing the female contestants’ looks – who he found to be hot.

“He asked the men to rate the women – he went down the line and asked the guys, ‘Who’s the most beautiful on the women’s team?’”

Financial adviser Gene Folkes said: “I think it was most uncomfortable when he had one contestant come around the board table and twirl around.”

2012: The Miss Universe pageant kicked out contestant Jenna Talackova for not declared she is transgender. Attorney Gloria Allred declared that no one had asked Trump to “prove” he was a man by showing his anatomy. In response, Trump told TMZ Live that when it comes to his penis: “I think Gloria would be very impressed.”

He attacked Cher on Twitter after she accused him of wearing a “rug.” “Cher, I don’t wear a ‘rug’ — it’s mine. And I promise not to talk about your massive plastic surgeries that didn’t work.”

2013: Trump reveals he knows why there are so many victims of sex crimes in the military: “26,000 unreported sexual assaults in the military — only 238 convictions. What did these geniuses expect when they put men & women together?”

2015: Someone handling Trump’s Twitter account tweeted “If Hillary Clinton can’t satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America?”

Trump told The New York Times: “ “Heidi Klum. Sadly, she’s no longer a 10.”

Trump insulted fellow Republican candidate for president Carly Fiorina about her looks:  “Look at that face. Would anyone vote for that?

“Can you imagine that, the face of our next next president? I mean, she’s a woman, and I’m not supposed to say bad things, but really, folks, come on. Are we serious?”

And: “Why does she keep interrupting everybody?”

About Hillary Clinton, this year: “Bill Clinton was the worst in history and I have to listen to her talking about it? Just remember this: She was an unbelievably nasty, mean enabler.

“And what she did to a lot of those women is disgraceful. So put that in her bonnet and let’s see what happens.”

“She doesn’t have the look. She doesn’t have the stamina.”

Of former Miss Universe winner, Alicia Machado, whom he called “Miss Piggy” and “Miss Housekeeping,” Trump tweeted: “Did Crooked Hillary help disgusting (check out sex tape and past) Alicia M become a U.S. citizen so she could use her in the debate?” The Republican presidential nominee told Americans they should check out a sex tape, which does not actually exist.

He did, however, admit to watching Paris Hilton’s sex tape, in an interview with Howard Stern unearthed this year: “Now, somebody who a lot of people don’t give credit to but in actuality is really beautiful is Paris Hilton. I’ve known Paris Hilton from the time she’s 12, her parents are friends of mine, and the first time I saw her she walked into the room and I said, ‘Who the hell is that?’”

Stern asked him: “Did you wanna bang her?”

Trump replied: “Well, at 12, I wasn’t interested. I’ve never been into that … but she was beautiful.”

Apprentice Producer Katherine Walker told the Associated Press Trump frequently talked about women’s bodies and said he speculated about which female contestant would be “a tiger in bed”. While a crew member who asked not to be identified, recalled: “We were in the boardroom one time figuring out who to blame for the task, and he just stopped in the middle and pointed to someone and said, ‘You’d fuck her, wouldn’t you? I’d fuck her. C’mon, wouldn’t you?'”

That revelation came out the Monday before the release of the video of Trump’s vulgar remarks about former Access Hollywood host Nancy O’Dell, who now hosts Entertainment Tonight. O’Dell summed up how many American women feel:

“Politics aside, I’m saddened that these comments still exist in our society at all. When I heard the comments yesterday, it was disappointing to hear such objectification of women. The conversation needs to change because no female, no person, should be the subject of such crass comments, whether or not cameras are rolling. Everyone deserves respect no matter the setting or gender. As a woman who has worked very hard to establish her career, and as a mom, I feel I must speak out with the hope that as a society we will always strive to be better.”

4. Not All Guys

By Jennell Jaquays

In the past, I was able to work stealth in all-male environments in the entertainment industry that might as well have been those boys clubs, those “locker rooms” used as excuses for Trump’s talk and actions (and I’ve been stealth in some locker rooms as well). Some men did talk in private like Trump does. More, actually many more did not.

It was always uncomfortable to be around such decidedly unprofessional conduct with the ones who did. It makes me sad to even think about my daughter or step daughters having to work with, or work for, or even date men like this.

So I’d like to finish with a quote that came into my feed by way of Rebecca Wald “If you have a male friend explaining right now that ‘all guys are like that in private,’ he’s telling you something important about himself. Believe him.”

Now it’s your turn! Add your own monologue in the comments  below,  or email them to me at dawnennis@gmail.com, trying to keep it to 200-500 words each. Focus on what Trump’s comments about women mean to you. ALL feminine-identified people are invited to participate! Thank you!

2 thoughts on “Pussy Grabs Back! The Trump Monologues

  1. I m a widow of 72 years. Worked as a truck driver. As told I should be home ,barefoot, nd pregnant. A Donald dick trump point of view. So here s my answer to his point of view a tazer or a cattle prod which I carried at all times to theivonc family dad go invest in the cattle prod it puts a 2,000 pound bull to the ground. Jackie ivanco should never elect alone with Donald dick trump who lets his dick do all the thinking for him. Dicky trump should quit reading anything regarding hitleriizim , stop the cocaine use, and take moreviagra so he can go deaf, dumb, and blind in one fell swoop. Donald dick trump if let to go as he s now planning will have world war 3 and a civil war before he s in office 6 mos. May Gloria Allred and her clients tumble the Donald dick trump pussy snatcher tothe gutter where he be
    Longs.

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  2. I m a woman of 72. Drove 18 wheeler trucks for 15 yrs. a few of them male drivers had a problem. My reply here s my checking account number fill it up and I ll go home. I was a widow who had a house to pay for, 40,000 dollars in medical. Bills on my husband. Now here s how woman ought to handle a dick like Donald dick trump carry a tazer,cattle prod,they also have one for hogs very similar to the tazer. Not 1 truck driver tried any sort of snatch grabbing with me. In other words Donald dick trump is a insult evento pigskin general. Here s a little advice to mr. Avonco under no circumstance leave Jackie alone with mr. Dick trump without the above mentioned electrical shockers. They were meant for pigs like trump.

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